I’ve been making self-care a priority lately and I can definitely see and feel the difference.
Carving out 1 hour a day to go for walk, run errands, go to Home Good/Target or whatever it is that makes me feel sane is life changing. Who knew that an hour could make such a huge impact on your mental health. Taking care of ME is a new concept and one that I am not accustomed to. To be honest, I don’t know how I survived in my previous life.
You can see the difference in my face and smile. No more cutting off my head in photos. No more hiding behind my pain. Baby steps towards a healthier version of me. I used to feel guilty (and sometimes still do) for taking time out for myself. It’s not selfish, it’s a necessity.
I have to give Mr. Right a lot of credit. He encourages me to go and take time for myself. He sometimes has to force me (lol). I’m stubborn and would rather spend the hour of free time working and getting things done around the house. I’m learning that this is NOT considered self care. I was feel like if I’m “relaxing” or not being productive, that it was considered lazy. I’m pretty certain I am not the only person that feels this way. If you’re reading this and know exactly what I’m talking about, then you need more self care! Make yourself a priority. It’s not only good for your mental health but will make you more productive.
Another random thought and something that I continue to work on in therapy is learning to have compassion and empathy for those who have wronged us. This is a constant struggle for me but this is exactly why I go to therapy. Sometimes we think it’s easier to hate someone because they’ve hurt us. What I’m learning is that it takes just as much energy if not more to hate someone than to forgive them. How do you have compassion or empathy for someone who has hurt you? How is this even possible? Hate rots your soul. Whoever has hurt you, forgive them and move on. Have compassion for them because more than likely they need more help than you do. They more often than not have deep rooted issues that they’re not willing to face or get help to overcome. So they hurt the ones the love because they are hurting inside. Have empathy for them because they lack the capability to feel empathy. Pray for them because they most definitely need it. When you learn to turn your pain into compassion and empathy, you grow as a human being and become a better person because of it.
I’m a work in progress however at least I’m TRYING to improve myself and am willing to get help. I want to be a better partner, mother, daughter, sister and friend. The past several years has taught me so much. I’ve gained my identity back and am now figuring out how to love and take care of myself. It has truly been a blessing. XO
Dress: c/o Ann Taylor marled button sweater dress (size XXSP) | Slippers | Desk (another similar option HERE) | Pink velvet tufted chair | Gold Tray | White Pitcher + Similar Pink Peonies | Acrylic tape dispenser | Peekskill Rug c/o Boutique Rugs | Gold stapler
On another note, this marled button sweater dress is SO comfortable and perfect for working from home! You can still look professional for Zoom calls but feel super cozy while on calls. Sizing runs true to size and I’m wearing XXSP. I also got this herringbone funnel neck coat and this balloon sleeve sweater. If you’re in need of a classic trench coat, I’m loving this plaid lined camel jacket I wore HERE. Ann Taylor is having a great sale – get 50% off 3 full priced items with code: ITSBIG. Obsessed with these cap toe block heel pumps!
Annie!!! I’m trying so hard to believe it’s ok to get self care. I know it is ok and necessary but it’s a struggle for me
Internally. You’re blog post has helped me see that it is ok. I’ll keep working on it! 🙂
Hi Vickie! Awww…I totally understand! It’s a daily struggle for me and I still can’t fully comprehend that it’s good and necessary. I never had it before after having Milan and I was a hot mess. The guilt that I used to feel was real. I still feel it but am working on getting better and making self care a priority. You are doing great! XX
Dear Annie,
Thank you so much for sharing your personal thoughts and struggles. I have been following along with your journey in overcoming negative narcissist people. In reading your blog, I can finally put a label on my “narcissist family member.” This person has caused major drama within my family. I appreciate your piece today on forgiveness as I agree this hate thing eats you up inside.
Once again thank you for being so honest and raw with your own struggles.
Love your office and sweet family! Happy New Year!!!
Hi Laura,
Thank you so much for sharing. Dealing with a narcissist is no joke. It’s not often recognized or talked about because most of the time we don’t even know what’s happening! Forgiveness is so hard but therapy has helped me heal and forgive. I’m not all the way there yet but it sure feels good to be on the right path. Hate definitely rots our soul and who wants that. Thank you for following along and hope this New Year brings happiness and relief:) XX
So true! I Thanks for sharing.
Right? Thank you for stopping by 🙂 XX
Your growth is beautiful to see 🙂
Hello! Thank you for this really inspiring article, I think that Self care is way more important than we realize. When we fail in this area, it really leads to burnout. Thanks for the reminder to check in with ourselves and make sure all our needs are being met. So often, we put ourselves last and neglect even important aspects of our own mental and physical care. Have an amazing weekend, everyone! ♥️